WHO IS A GOOD WIFE?

Text; Proverbs 18:22
” He who finds a wife finds a good thing… ” -NKJV

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BUT THE QUESTION IS…
Who is a good wife? At least, if you know what you’re looking for, only then can you know when you’ve found it. It’s important for both men and women (especially those who have not yet married) to understand, from our text, that: just being a woman does not make you a wife. You are only a wife when you are “a good thing”.
That’s why I always say to the single women, “Women are born; but wives are made. Use your days of singleness to prepare yourself. “
This is one thing men have to understand before approaching any woman (not girl) for marriage. Because you’re not just looking for a woman, you’re looking for a wife -a good thing,a suitable  help for you in life and the pursuit of your dreams; not just a “cooker” of your food, a “borner” of your children, or a sex object! An asset, not a liability!

WHO IS A GOOD WIFE?
God has the answer to every question in the Scriptures (2 Timothy 3:15-17). If you’re ignorant and blind to the truth, it’s your fault… and don’t you dare blame anyone for what you get!

Now, let’s look through The Living Bible translation of Proverbs 31 and get some hints about who a good wife is…
She is worth more than precious gems (i.e., nothing else a man possesses can be compared to a wife in his life!).
Her husband can trust her.
She will richly satisfy his needs (it’s never about her! ). She will not hinder him, but help him all her life (so a good wife will never leave her husband… ).
She works, makes her own wealth (not depending on her husband for everything; not a “housewife”, not an “oriaku”), no excuse for laziness or idleness!
She is a home maker (manages her children and servants well ( so God expects a wife to have servants, house helps -yes! )
She’s interested in their welfare.
She cares for the poor and generously helps those in need (so, she’s not stingy or selfish with what she and her husband have; neither is she a dog in a manger).
She takes care of her looks.
She’s a woman of strength and dignity – never causes her husband any embarrassment.
When she speaks, her words are wise.
Kindness is the rule of everything she says.
She’s a woman who fears and reverences the Lord.
Then it concludes with these…
” Praise her for the many fine things she does… These good deeds of hers shall bring her honor and recognition from people of importance. “

CAN ONE SEE ALL THESE IN A WOMAN BEFORE MARRIAGE?
Of course! That’s why courtship is important before wedding! If you give time for courtship, with dating and constant fellowship (minus sex of course! ), it is easy to give at least 50% assessment of the kind of wife a woman will be. Don’t rush into marriage. No excuse justifies that!

That’s why I don’t believe in marriage by proxy (through pictures). A picture can show you the packaging, but not the content! It’s the content that is the wife.

I also don’t advocate long distance courtship (i.e. by phone calls, video chat, Skype, whatsapp or Facebook).That’s making a joke of the foundation of your marriage. You will have no one to blame when things begin to fall apart!

IF YOU’RE ALREADY MARRIED…
If you’re already in marriage, with your help, encouragement, patience and understanding, you can still help the woman you married to be all these things. Yes you can! And yes, she can change!

HOW DO I BECOME A GOOD WIFE?
(…to be continued).

WORD FOR TODAY

RAISING OUR DAUGHTERS TO BE WIVES
Text : Proverbs 18:22
“He that findeth a wife, findeth a good thing and obtaineth favour from the Lord. “

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I have come to realise that raising our daughters to be women of character and godly virtues, is more important than raising them to know how to cook, keep house and have children. Yes!

LEARN TO DO…
Isaiah 1:17a says, “Learn to do well… “
You do marriage with what you have first learnt to do well. However, you can learn how to cook and keep house after marriage and still have a good marriage. Why not? But you can’t learn character in marriage – it is the most important treasure a wife takes into her marriage. It is actually what makes marriage work. It is what makes “a capable wife” more than a university degree! It is the way to win her husband’s heart and contribute to his success and progress in life, more than through his stomach!

GOOD COOK? YES! BUT…
Many women are good cooks and homemakers; many have babies for their husbands every year. But their character has caused so much damage to their husbands, children and the family they married into. They are destroyers not builders! Because it is wisdom the woman uses to build a home, not culinary expertise or academic or professional qualification (Proverbs 14:1). And I tell you wisdom, character, strength and spiritual intelligence are not learnt in school! It’s in the home; and somebody has to consciously teach them, model them and inculcate them into these to-be wives (and husband’s of course!).

Please, dear parents, fathers and mothers, let’s begin to consciously organise for a better tomorrow for the country, society and our communities by paying more attention to the women who shape the leaders and people who man the various facets of our nation and society… our daughters! Let us not be more concerned about their becoming doctors, lawyers,bankers,professors, etc.

BORN TO MARRY!
Every child born a female is born to be somebody’s wife, except they choose not to marry. But God makes male and female to come into marriage and form a formidable team to rule and govern the earth, and see His purpose for creating the earth fulfilled. Read Genesis 1:26-28.
But many marriages have frustrated this divine purpose because many of the male and female that end up in marriage are not consciously trained, taught and prepared to “practice” marriage.
Can you imagine, for instance, if untrained men and women are practicing medicine? Just think about it… Then you can imagine what is happening in marriages and families!
But things can change!
The wife is a very, very important part of the marriage equation, I tell you! If she says things will work, I tell you nothing can stop her! And if she says they won’t, hah! Get ready for the reign of hell and Satan!
It’s all about character, more than the ability to handle domestic duties…
Please, let’s partner with God to make the world a better and safer place, from generation to generation!